WHAT IS IT ANYWAY?
7/6/98
At noon I went over to Lowe’s. Whenever I do that, I hear Rush for a little while.
In the short time I listened, there was a lot of discussion of oral sex. Those two words seem to combine a lot whenever people with too much time on their hands are talking about Bill Clinton.
I was immediately reminded of a hilarious story that Doctor Laura once told about a woman who was trying to sue a company because someone from that company had told her that he would get her a job in exchange for oral sex. She complied, and a couple of days later, when she called the company to inquire about her job, she was told that the job description of her “interviewer” gave him no authority to hire anyone. Let’s say that she had been “tricked”.
I didn’t give it much thought at first, but later began to ponder. How did that woman administer the oral sex in question? Did she crawl under the fellow’s desk, or lean back against it? What does the phrase mean? Naturally we have our immediate first impressions, but there are certainly more meanings than one for that particular combination of two words. Isn't kissing “oral sex”?
Once, many years ago, when I was a younger fellow and an enthusiastic thespian, I was engaged in deep conversation with our director, a woman several years my senior. I can’t remember what we were discussing, but when someone approached, she looked up from our huddle and casually remarked “we’re having sex.” As I think about it, I can truthfully say that we were having oral sex. Actually vocal. We had been exchanging points of view, and since we were sexual opposites, surely sex was involved.
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